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I really need to talk to somebody about my problems. I cannot do that so I decided to start this blog. I really don't know if anyone reads that but it's reliefing. (My english is not that good so I am sorry about that). Right now I listen to some real sad music. That's so depressing. Every song is about love. I've never experienced something like that. Just had some small romances which caused a lot of pain. Having a real relationship with a person that truly admires and loves you must be wonderful. I am longing for that. Well, I know there's more in life but I think it would make me stronger and happier to have a man by my side. Also that shitty gossip would end. One night stands are nothing for me. I have no idea if people post such personal stuff on blogs..but nobody cares about some articles where people argue about a stupid topic. At least that's my oppinion. Tomorrow I want to start changing my life. At first I was thinking about a new hair colour but I kind of like mine to be honest. So how shall I change my life? I know that I have to get my food disorder fixed. All I think about the whole day is food. I am not fat but I want to be really skinny again. Right now am a size 36 (S). I hate my stomach's so bloated cause I stuff all kinds of food in me. So tomorrow I will start to resist food. Let's see if that works out. Good night.
24.8.14 09:46


Why is it so hard to lose weight? I love food!!! That's so unfair. I don't have the discepline to resist it. Since I've been living in California I am hungry all the time. Every monday I want to start my diet but then I am way to lazy to workout. It sucks. Well, tomorrow is my first day of school. Hopefully there are some cute guys. I need to look my best but to be honest I think nobody will hit on me. (nobody who's cute) I am so desperate I would date anyone who's 'ok'. I just wanna fall in love.
26.8.14 07:57


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